Dear Hull City Council,
Parking Meters are brilliant. I love parking meters. I love how they take my money, and give me a little bit of paper in return.
Why does it cost so much to park? Once you’ve bought some land, you’ve bought it. All I want to do is sit my car on a bit of your land for a while. And the bit of paper can’t cost much.
It’s great how, when you have exactly the right change, it will take offense against one of your coins, refusing to take it. And no way will it give change! If it costs £4.80 to park and you put in a fiver, well guess what, that’s a free tip for the good old parking meter! Still I suppose it does have to sit out in the rain… oh hang on, it’s an inanimate object so it doesn’t care!
Anyway, I’ve come up with a solution.
Individual Charging!
I’m a unique individual, with millions of unique genes and cells within me. Don’t you want me to be around? To spend money in your shops?
As of 1 March 2010, I’m going to charge all local authorities for the honour of me parking on their land. £10 a day. You’ll just pay it because it takes too long to query an invoice that only costs £10. Soon I’ll be rolling in money, and when anyone asks “Where does my council tax go?” I can say “Me!”
I’ll be sending my first invoice over to yourselves asap.
Dear Sir/Madam,
I am writing this email to complain about a car that is parked over a dropped curb which I know is illegal as I received a parking ticket for doing the same thing a few weeks ago and yet the house opposite constantly parks cars across the dropped curb and do not receive a ticket for this offence. I have a picture of this car parked across the dropped curb and I would love to send it to you as phone calls are not doing any good.
Yours Sincerely,
Mr Selwyn Davies
I Have recently received a !Contractual Parking Charge Notice! from a company named G24 Ltd.,
I have been charged for parking on a carpark of a disused supermarket which also contains a small unit
named Sports Direct selling sports equipment. {The location of this carpark :is King Street St Helens Merseyside}
There are no manned barriers nor machine to supply parking ticket, but there are camara,s that photograph your reg No.when entering and leaving same ,also record times of enter / exit same.
also notices stating charge of fine if over time limit of one hour max.
This charge is £95.00 which I consider is rather exessive for a parking offence, I also went to see the
store manager of Sports Direct and he commented that the method of fine had nothing to do with his store {although the parking fine stated that they were acting on behalf of their client [Sports Direct ]}
G24 states the duration of my parking was 101 minutes {not their max of 60 minutes} and for that I
was fined £95.00.
They also state that all data applicable to me were obtained from the DVLA {of which i totally disagree
with this method of obtaining such data}
I look forward to your comments on same
Regards E.Barton