Dear Ambling Pedestrians,

Why is it certain people don’t understand the meaning of haste? When I’m walking through town I generally have a goal of where I need to go. To a meeting, work, home, to catch a bus. It makes life far simpler if you know where you’re going when you head out of the door. So I can’t help but wonder why other people don’t employ this level of common sense in their lives. Or even just in their daily trip out of the house.

Yes madam, you may have all the time in the world at your disposal but some of us can’t enjoy such a luxury. Why do you have to walk so slowly when you’re the same age as me and just as capable of reaching the same average speed? And what on earth makes you think it’s okay to just suddenly stop in the middle of the street?! I can understand if you’re heading over to the side to look in a window, at least then you’d be out of my way. But to stop for NO REASON right in front of me so I fall over my own feet trying to avoid bumping into your inconsiderate backside is ridiculous!

It gets worse. In the street I have the chance to side step you with minimal frustration and inconvenience to myself and others around me. I suppose some people can’t help being stupid out in the open. So why, why for the love of God do some people have to do it on buses too?! I take the bus to get to work like a lot of people, when we press the button to stop the damn vehicle it means we want to get off at that stop. It doesn’t mean it’s time for you to push your way to the front of the queue and block the door with your multitude of shopping bags to have a chat with the driver! Are you blind? Can’t you see the queue of irate commuters tapping their feet and rolling their eyes at you while you blither away to a man who only wants to get on with his job? He doesn’t want to talk to you! We don’t want you to talk to him!

If you’ve got a pushchair with you don’t get me started. Especially if there are a few of you out with strollers in a line having a chat. Go single file! You don’t OWN the street, you have no right to take up the whole thing so everyone else has to fall off the pavement before being mown down by certain mothers who should be tested for driving licenses before being allowed out in public with their pushchairs!

It’s not rocket science people, it’s common sense and consideration for your fellow pedestrians.

Stop being such a nuisance!

If you can’t walk in a way that won’t annoy people just stay home for the sake of the rest of us!


Someone trying to get to work on time.