Dear Pet Owner,

I regret to have to inform you that Boo Boo is ill; he has a chest infection, a broken leg, worms and he ate a tin can which is ruining his insides. Unfortunately, to fix any one of these problems it’s going to cost you heap of money, not ‘cos I’m funny but ‘cos it’s not free and he’s your pet not mine. You see – I have to employ people with very special skills, they need very special tools and bits and bobs to get the job done. Boo Boo will be a blue Boo without pain relief and antibiotics which I’ve already paid for and I can give to your pet if you cover my costs, it’s only fair – I can’t give it away, there’s hundreds of animals just like Boo, all formed in an orderly queue, waiting for me or my associates to fix them.

You see pets should cost you money, if you look after them properly they’re an expensive luxury, not a given right. When they get ill, which they will ‘cos they’re alive and when they have an accident, which they will ‘cos they’re alive, you need to be able to say “yes vet, I have the cash” or “yes vet, I have insurance” “no vet it’s your fault I have a pet I can’t afford to take care of” isn’t an option. If all vets cured your pets at a financial loss they’d be bust in a month. There wouldn’t be any vets, there would be nowhere to take the sick and the injured pets we’re so proud of. Perhaps we should introduce a pet tax to all pet owners so the government can set up a fluffy NHS? No paws too small…

The most annoying scene, is the owner that screams over the counter at how unfair, the cost to care for Boo Boo with the upset tum, they haven’t got any money but they found the grand to cross the hand of the breeder who gave them the posh pedigree pooch….a dog is for life don’t you know?
If you really care, really, really care about your very own Boo Boo, be prepared to find the spare cash you WILL need for when your Boo Boo needs help. The vet has the skills, the staff and the equipment for sale.

Oh and by the way, a vets is a vets not a bank, we don’t have credit licenses so we can’t lend you money so no you can’t pay in installments, just like you can’t at Asda!

It’s up to you – not us

The Vet