Dear Top level brass\Mr Berkett\Secretary,
I’ve never been a Virgin customer until recently, I always heard such bad things about you guys, the customer service is terrible, it’s unreliable, you can’t understand them when they speak to you. I thought it was all a load of rubbish in the end, I didn’t think any company could actually be that bad. How wrong I’ve been proven.

It all started on a wonderful summer’s day. Our House moving day was approaching, you should have seen our faces, I’d go as far as to say we were ecstatic. That was until we realised the Virgin service we had been promised that would be installed a few days after we were in, wasn’t going to happen!

The previous old tenant, a wonderful lady had thoughtfully cancelled her contract in plenty of time so we would have no issues getting set-up. She tried her hardest to help us, knowing how important the internet was for our work. Virgin however, did not try their hardest.

I can’t be bothered to go into details; I feel I’ve explained it to many times now. I want you to go and read my call history, I want you to take in everything that has gone wrong, I want you to feel half the amount of pain I do. Here is my original Order Ref number – *************

ONWARDS! We finally get set-up, the engineer is most helpful, apart from the fact he didn’t really listen to what I said so installed everything in the wrong place. No worries though, after being told I would have to pay £99 for the getting what I originally asked for, you relented and Mr Engineer is coming this Tuesday to sort that issue out! But, there is more. I live in an area which is supposedly having a lot of faults with Modems dropping out. This is most frustrating; often my internet will die for hours on end. Before I knew this I rang your wonderful technical support… It made me want to cry.

The lady I spoke to was not very helpful at all. After telling her my internet was down and I was connected through a cable, she talked me through changing the wireless channel, then resetting the modem and router. Why oh why did I change my wireless channel? Can you please explain in detail, why I was told to do that, even though I had told her I was running through a cable? Anyway, the reboot worked (1 in 5 work) so according to her my problem was fixed. I tried pointing out that changing the wireless channel was not going to resolve it and she said it was. She agreed to call me back at 2pm to see if I had been having any more issues. I wanted with my cup of tea at the phone at 1:50pm, hoping, the call would be incoming soon. I wanted by that phone for 6 hours. 6 hours of the same cup of tea, 6 hours perched on the phone stool. Constantly speaking out loud to make sure I hadn’t gone deaf and it was in fact me not hearing the phone. 8pm my phone call arrives. She was somewhat apologetic I guess, but I didn’t really feel she meant it. Unfortunately\gratefully my internet had been working fine since earlier, so the problem was closed.

PROBLEM REOPENED! So, it keeps on happening, changing the wireless channel has not helped obviously, who would have guessed. So, I ring tech support again and would you believe it, I actually get a great guy. Honestly, he knew what he was talking about, said he saw a fault on the line and would get me an engineer out the next day. He was my shining beacon in the internet swamp of despair.

Engineer day arrived; apart from being a bit late (which he let us know about) he was adequate. Well, I say that. He did some webpage tests, went on and so on and it all worked. Then it died for him, just like it died for me so many times. I was happy, someone had seen the problem. Maybe this would spur them onto fix it. Maybe use his fancy beeping tool to jumpstart my line. Of course that’s not what happened. He went on to tell me that there has been a known fault in my area for past 3-4 weeks. Why no one felt the need to mention this to me is I don’t quite understand, but ok. He said Motorola supply some equipment, us guys believe it’s their fault, they believe it’s not. His exact works after this were “its politics” WOW! So politics are stopping me getting a good service. I’m so pleased. Maybe Red Ed can help me? I asked if there was an ETA, he said no. I asked what would happen next, he said he would log the fault, the more calls logged the faster it will get fixed supposedly. I guess just one customer having a problem isn’t an issue. He then took his plastic bags off his shoes and left.

So to summarise for Mr Branson when he reads this
Install completely messed up (date and actual cable position)
Fault with internet, known fault, no eta, Virgin and Motorola playing the blame game
Incompetent lady on tech support
excellent man on tech support

I’m left with a half functioning broadband connection which I’m paying full price for with no idea when it’s going to be fixed. On the plus side, the TV works great. So, can someone let me know how is this going to be rectified, when it’s going to be rectified and what procedures have been put in place to stop the poor phone support and faulty service not coming back to bite me in the future.
What I’d like to happen now.

A response from someone high up with an answer to every question I’ve asked in here. A phone call, letter and Email please, just so I don’t miss it.
Mr Branson to book me on one of his flights to space, doesn’t have to be the first one, anyone will do. If there are numerous packages the cheapest will be fine too.
Sky sports thrown in would be great!

You know this has got to me so much, I’ve having bad dreams about Richard Branson chasing me. His beard is so soft from the outside but when he catches up to me, it engulfs me and it’s like a thorn bush. I keep trying to break free but my internet cable gets tied around my hands and feet. The ironic thing is that my phone works fine in the dream on the internet so it’s working well there. Sucks huh?

I don’t think I’ve been unreasonable here and I certainly hope I haven’t offended anyone.

Thank you,